Recently, one of my girlfriends mentioned to me that her ex-boyfriends have been coming out of the woodwork on Facebook. Some are recent, some from high school and college. It seems that just about everyone has joined Facebook within the last year. The tricky part is, how do you handle the people who once held your hand and your heart, but are no longer your other half? Keep in mind that once you "friend" them, they will have access to your photos, videos, will be able to see what other people write on your wall, and anything else that you post on your Facebook. In other words, that now stalker-ish Romeo-reject will have the 411 on your current life stats. This is the opposite of out-of-sight-out-of-mind. This is ALWAYS in sight = now ALWAYS on mind.
I'd like to get your input on this social media conundrum. Any comments?
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Id say only friend exes on a case by case basis. If they ask to be your friend and you dont friend them, its not like you have to explain why. Thinking about the exes in my life, there are not many I would "friend on facebook" right now. I dont talk to any of them now, so why let them in on my business just because of the magic of social media.
ReplyDeleteI just happened upon your blog today. I have a hard time with facebook issues too. I'm a big time people person and I love finding out what happened to people. I've actually befriended exes on facebook and acquaintances, but it can be awkward. None of them are the stalker types, but after the initial catch up, I'd rather just take them off my friend list...but that's considered rude...
ReplyDeleteif you look deeper into security you will find that you can block individual people from certain sections. Just put the exes on a short leash. after a while, you can just drop them and see if they complain. You can always blame it on new security tweeks that "accidently" got them. Willing to bet after two months they wouldn't even notice
ReplyDeleteI was interested in the responses you would get on this one.
ReplyDeletei have had ex boyfriends from HS request friendship on facebook. i have said No. i know that i would wonder why my hubby had ex girlfriends on his. i trust him, but i don't know these women??? i don't ad Ex's out of respect for my husband.
ReplyDeleteI think Lizzy summed it up well. If you're married, and your spouse isn't comfortable with it ... don't do it (rude or not).
ReplyDeletei say let things be. would you want them back in your life on a face to face basis?
ReplyDeleteyes, well okay. no, i'd leave it be.
I think if you are comfortable with "him" and you know your husband wouldn't mind, I don't see a problem.
ReplyDeleteBesides, the exes can always look at your photos and see what they missed out on : )
When I noticed that certain people became FB friends with my other friends, I blocked them right away, before they found me. At the same time, I am continuing to have friendly relationship with two of my exes, one of those being recovered thanks for the FB. Not without mutual trauma, but it is clear and enjoyable now. Isn’t it called “closure?”
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